I'm totally busted this time. I have fallen in love with someone that I know I will not have the chance to be with him, He have boyfriend already, how will he going to be with me? Yeah, I think you all guess it right. It's him, Douglas. He is charming to me somehow. Everything started with the day of my convocation.
He asked me to go to clubbing at "Maison" to watch a fashion show (Private Structure). It was also to celebrate my convocation for me. It's only me and him. Supposing he is coming at 8pm to pick my up but then he thought of having dinner with me so he called me to let me know he is picking me up at 7pm. On his way here, he got caught not using hand-free while using the phone and he forgot where is his license is place. So the policemen issued him a summon. I felt so sad for him.
When he reached my house, he picked me up and drove me to his home to find his driving license. His house is magnificent. Forget about his house, then we can't find it, so we hit back to the road and grab a simple dinner at McDonald's.
Reached "Maison" around 9pm but then the crowd was really little and we ended up waiting for it till 1am. During the wait, we meet a foreigner (I think he is a top), come with a Malaysian (guess is a bottom). That foreigner talked to us and tease us a bit. He even flirt me a bit and lick my shoulder saying that I'm sweet. It's just nothing to be mention.
Before the show start, we found a place to sit (a couch) and we rest there. After a few moment of sitting next to each other, and his arms around me, we actually kiss each other in that club. Maybe because influence of alcohol (I drank a couple of glasses of vodka), which is not much actually makes me kinda daring to kiss him, a guy that I have feel and like him and I know that he have a boyfriend. Feeling myself a bit sluttish. But this time, I can't hide my feeling anymore. After that show, he sent me back and we did oral each other. That's it, he went home as it's really late and I understand.
The next day, I woke up thinking of him. I guess I loves him already. But this is the first time of me being so irrational to be with a guy that have a boyfriend and I'm not so minding about. Feeling like I'm so cheapskate. Then I thought I can't forget about him, maybe I'm just lusty or so. I hate this part right here just like the song sang by The Pussycat Dolls, just with a little different from their lyric.
I even chatted with him just now, and I know he is liking me but then he wanna me to meet up his boyfriend today for dinner. I found it odd but then I'm missing him. This is the only way I can see him today but then I gotta behave. Pretending I'm having nothing with him in front of his boyfriend. Found myself like involving in triangle relationship and hate myself not stopping it which is so not like me. I'm so confused. All I hope is that I can find a decent guy that only into me, wanting and willing to spent his life with me only for the rest of the remaining time we on Earth.
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