My 100th Post - Headache

This is the 100th post I posted in this blog. Thinking it back, it almost a year (11 months to be exact) since I started blogging about my gay life. By taking the average, I am blogging about 9 blogs per month. That's equivalent to 2.25 blogs per week.

Today, I fall sick. Not serious but manage to stop me driving to the nearest station to board the train to work - headache. It's not a very new symptom, in fact it is kind of following me for a long time like a shadow. So I have the time to actually blog here.

Tonight, I will be watching a show with Doug. I have no idea which one are we watching this evening, and I am thinking probably the Cantonese film that he mentioned before that day. Since he has watched "How to Train Your Dragon" with someone else, I guess it would not be the same one later in the evening.

I am seriously missing him but then at the same time, I am worried. Will my love to him causes him trouble as well to myself? Reading back my previous blog, I just realize that it's been so long since I am single without an actual boyfriend. However, I have been in the complex relation since early August last year.

Reading back on my own old posts do make me having the melancholy feeling. From the naive guy of me in the past who phobic to being a spoiler in one's relationship to now someone who is being with someone who already have a boyfriend. Although he never wanted me to be his boyfriend as he already have one, but then I can't explain about the connection between us. I am not his boyfriend but I am a very important friend of him if I wanted to make it in words.

I am so jealous about everything Keith having right now, which I do not. LOL. It's just a joke since today is April Fool. I do not jealous, maybe a little envy of him. Well, he is young, and probably having more friends than I do, and having him as boyfriend.

I do feel a little upset actually as this will be the second year of me celebrating my own birthday without a boyfriend. I do believe he will try his best to celebrate with me. However, I do not dare to put too high hope because I worry there will be some accident. I will just accept whatever is the outcome. I do feel, my life will be somehow like this for kind of very long time more. Single and no one wanted me because I am ordinary and not appealing.