Can I be happy a work? Well, he is my boss afterall. I can't be mad at him for long. It's my fault too. He is right. I'm lack of confident in me. Hiring me as an executive should be having certain amount of confident and quality to execute certain things or task given to me by him. I'm suppose to help him solve matters and not making him sorting it out for me.
However, am I capable of such manner? I didn't ask for this executive position. I'm not even sure I'm capable of doing such job in the first place. Today for instance, he sounded me indirectly of not being confident enough to make a decision myself and asking too much questions. I asked him too many times for the same question. Does he feels annoyed by me already?
Maybe I'm incompetent against JY or even Sherman. Possible I'm worst than Bryan. I'm doubting my existence in the company. Am I really that good enough for the department like he said if I'm lack of the very important thing in this industry which is confident?
I'm not feeling that well due to migraine hit back and my leg hurts since I accidentally injured it yesterday from my dance class. I didn't say anything doesn't mean I don't want him to care. Well, he didn't notice it. Forget it. Maybe I'm just being a baby now, wanting someone to pamper me at least.
I thank him for making some magic trick last night to cheer me up since I'm having headache. He did take some time to accompany for dinner. I appreciate that. But can I secure the position and the job here in the company? Can I even dream of getting promoted like what he used to told me that I have the potetial to be promoted? I'm started to feel I'm not so possible to be promotd or even able to secure the job here with my incompetency.
Anyway, I'm feeling better crying out in the washroom silently. I shouldn't say it's a cry become it just my tear drops a little. Maybe it's my headache and leg pain makes me shed tears. I can't read his mind at times. Are we having some gap after we work together or it's my problem only? I'm just too tired to think of anything now. I might need a good rest today.
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